ABSTINENCE MAKES THE HEART GROW FONDER

ABSTINENCE MAKES THE HEART GROW FONDER

Yes, you read that right. I wrote "abstinence," not "absence." One of the basics of every Christian love story should be abstinence (before marriage, of course; WINK). Abstinence means "voluntary forbearance, especially from indulgence of a craving." In this case, I'm talking about abstaining from sexual relations. The apostle Paul taught this in 1 Corinthians 6:18: "Flee from sexual immorality (sexual relations between unmarried people; 'fornication' in KJV)." Why? Verse 18 continues, then 19 and 20: "All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit…? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body."

According to these verses, sexual immorality desecrates the body more than any other sin. The apostle Paul is actually saying, "Don't have sex before marriage because it defiles the body, and your body is not your own. It belongs to God."

I could write reams about sexual intimacy within the bonds of marriage and the blessings it brings. It was created by God and is approved and blessed by Him. But I'm focusing on sexual intimacy outside the bonds of marriage right now.

I came across an article in USA Today by Elizabeth Sandoval on 8/19/05. From her writings, it seems she'd make a great heroine for a Christian romance novel. "I don't want to have sex," she writes. "Clarification: I do want to have sex, but only with my husband. And I don't have one of those yet."

Sandoval goes on to say she's not an ultraconservative with a houseful of cats; conversely, she's a middle-of-the-road "cute" 32-year-old who likes tattoos and loud music. She calls herself a neo-feminist, "one who respects her body so much that she won't allow it to be used as someone's playground."

Brava, Ms. Sandoval! Here, here. Amen and amen.

Sandoval talks about the club called Sex Is Natural and Fun and If It Makes You Happy, It Can't be That Bad," where people want sex, have sex, and then they're on to their next conquest. Not her, she proclaims. Then there's the club called You Have to Know If You're Sexually Compatible or the Marriage Will be Doomed, which she says is false intimacy. "Maybe one out of two marriages end in divorce precisely because people are too free with sex," she writes.

"Many women are weak minded in that they readily accept society's portrayal of sexual norms," she says. "The sheer prolificness of sex seems to make the decision for them."

My goodness, this woman is right on! She's got the goods. She concludes with, "Women give it up as if it's nothing. When in fact, it is everything."

Interesting.