DIVORCE? NEVER! BUT MURDER...?

It's been said that Ruth Graham, wife of Dr. Billy Graham, was once asked by a reporter, "In all your years of marriage to this revered and world-acclaimed minister, did you ever consider divorce?"

She replied, "Divorce? Never! Now murder?..."

I can see her eyes twinkling, like they do in her pictures in two of my favorite books, Ruth Graham…Celebrating An Extraordinary Life and Never Let It End…Poems of a Lifelong Love.

Recently, Dr. Billy Graham was asked by a reporter, I believe in USA Today, "How is your wife Ruth?" Dr. Graham said, "We are happily incompatible."

Happily incompatible?

What do these quotes mean?

Note: Keep reading to find out how you can win a free Christian love story (novel).

They mean that we need 1) to make allowances for our spouses, and 2) be assured that if we are opposites, we can still have a good marriage.

Has your spouse ever done something to you that hurts you, or disappoints you, or angers you, or _________ (you supply the word).

If so, you are not alone.

No marriage is perfect.

And no one can make you happy.

Yes, you read that right.

No one. No person. No husband (or wife). No Christian husband (or wife). No minister husband (or wife).

Ruth Graham says in Never Let It End: "It's a foolish woman who expects her husband to be to her that which only Jesus Christ Himself can be: always ready to forgive, totally understanding, unendingly patient, invariably tender and loving, unfailing in every area, anticipating every need, and making more than adequate provision. Such expectations put a man under an impossible strain. The same goes for the man who expects too much from his wife."

Talking about words of wisdom? Surely she's Queen Solomon.

Are you at odds right now with your spouse? Did s/he do or say something to you that wasn't right? You're the victim, correct, meaning you don't deserve such ill treatment?

If this hasn't happened to you lately, hang on, because it will. That's usually the course coupledom takes, because you've taken two different individuals who were raised in two different ways in two different family situations with two very different opinions, and plopped them down in one place and called it marriage.

So if you're at odds with your spouse, go find him/her and humble yourself. Tell him/her you want things to be pleasant and to go smoothly. Tell him/her you'll do whatever it takes to see this happen. Then give him/her a big kiss and assure him/her of your love.

I had the great privilege of interviewing Ruth Graham's daughter—who is her mother's namesake—and writing an article about her and her book In Every Pew Sits A Broken Heart. I mentioned that because I admire that family so much.

Here's what Jan Karon—author of the bestselling and well-loved Mitford novels (novel #1: At Home In Mitford)—had to say about Ruth and Billy Graham, below.

JAN KARON ON RUTH AND BILLY GRAHAM:

"I had a rare and precious opportunity to see a couple who have loved and lost, triumphed and failed—all of those things, together, in one flesh. (During that visit), I saw that they both had tremendous wills. They are both strong. Can you imagine Dr. Billy Graham being married to a weak woman? I cannot."

"I saw them tease each other, and I saw how merciless both he and she could be, and how they loved it. I saw how they held hands, how they looked fondly at one another, how they laughed."

"I just thought they were the cutest, sexiest couple I had ever seen."

I'd like for my husband Milton and me to be described like that.

I better go find him and humble myself and tell him I want things to go smoothly…

WIN A FREE CHRISTIAN LOVE STORY (NOVEL)

By commenting on my blog anytime, you are eligible to win a novel. This week, I'm giving away Waiting for Summer's Return (Bethany House Publishers) by Kim Vogel Sawyer. Last week, I gave away the newly-released A Vow to Cherish (Steeple Hill Publishers) by Deborah Raney.