Tuesday, November 11, 2008

PAPA, CAN I TALK TO NANA?

Milton, here for Kristy:

Monday afternoon late, I  talked on the phone for a few minutes with Alex and Nich about their camping trip this past weekend with the Cub Scouts. Julie took them and they all had a blast.

Alex and I talked first. I call him my pal.

Nich wanted me to come to a Thanksgiving Program at his school but couldn't remember the date. I have always called Nich my buddy.

Then Alex wanted to talk again. 

I heard him ask, "Papa, can I talk to Nana?"

My heart sank. I realized he had a momentary lapse and had forgotten. I paused a moment or so and gently said, "Alex, Nana is in heaven."

We both were stunned for a moment and then I could hear a little boys broken heart began to cry soft tears of sorrow. We both wiped tears. It hurt. He had forgotten and wanted to sing with Nana as they had for ever since he was big enough to sing.

It hurt. We all hurt. Someone told me that those are tears of healing. I believe that, but it hurts so bad.

***

Read the following post. I wrote it for today and then Alex and I had our phone call.

6 Comments:

At 9:51 AM, Blogger Kim said...

Crying with you and Alex, Milton. That is tough, but thank God He is holding you all so close to His heart!

Kim

 
At 12:51 PM, Blogger Kate said...

Dear Milton,

I have experienced a lot of death and other loss in my life. I can honestly say that your writings have ministered to me in incredible ways.

This entry is especially precious.

Kate.

 
At 1:39 PM, Blogger Robin Bayne said...

Awwww. . . . . (((HUGS)))

 
At 3:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Milton,

When a dear friend of mine died, I discovered Tear Bottles. Centuries ago, people would collect their tears in a tiny decorative jar. It was said that by the time the tears evaporated, the grieving process would be over. It was a symbol of mourning and respect for your loved one.

I liked the idea behind it because just as it takes time to fill the jar - it also takes time to evaporate the tears, and time to heal our hearts. It is normal for us to cry. To deeply miss someone who was an integral part of your life, no matter how long or short. And you and your family are certainly entitled to those tears. And I know in my heart you are all healing as well.

I am thankful for your blog, for the way you have chronicled your journey throughout Kristy's illness. You and your family are in my prayers, but I know God is holding you all very close to His heart.

Beth Szabo

 
At 5:35 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Milton, that touched my heart. I have a knot in my throat and warm tears flowing down my face. I wish it did not hurt so bad to lose a loved one. Thank you for sharing.
We love you.

Beth

 
At 3:53 AM, Blogger Barbara J. Robinson said...

Milton,

It's these types of little things that hurt and remind us of our loss the most. Reminds me of what I call my one phone call from heaven. After losing my youngest sister, I dreamed she was phoning me, and it was so real. I could hear her voice, and she sounded like herself. She kept saying, "I want to talk to . . . ." My husband woke me from the dream before I could finish it. I must have been talking out in my sleep from it or something. It's one dream I wish I could've finished. The phone call was so real, but I think it was to let me know she was in heaven, living her heavenly life and that she was happy. Barb

 

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